GLKnight Spotlight: The Warrior's Way

    Sometimes, the premise for a film alone can guarantee a rollicking good time. Some people can be sold when you tell them a single aspect of a film. Some get excited when you tell them a film's got Cowboys. Most bristle with happiness when you tell them a film's got Ninjas (yeah, you just bristled too). So what happens when you find out a film's got both Cowboys AND Ninjas? Well, like me, you exploded in giddy giggles and excited motions!
    And that's how I felt when I first heard about the Warrior's Way. Originally titled Laundry Warrior (you can see why the title was changed), the film had a very well done trailer. Some bits looked unfinished (but that's acceptable for a trailer), and with some key scenes and bits of dialogue, it had all the makings of a good waste of time. So, it all comes down to this: Did the Knight waste his time, his money, or both? And should you do the same?

    In the late 1800's/early 1900's, Yang (played by Dong-gun Jang) was a warrior who was raised to decimate an entire clan, but has betrayed his cause. Saving the life of a baby girl who belongs to his enemy, he seeks to escape the morose life of a killer, fleeing to America to find his friend who runs a laundromat. Finding the town dilapidated and his friend dead, he takes over the laundromat, and befriends the locals, particularly Lynne (played by Kate Bosworth) a woman with a sad past and an intense interest in blades, and Ron (played by Geoffrey Rush) the town drunk who has a reason to stay drunk.
    But the idyllic life Yang builds will be sorely tested when an old enemy of the town comes back, forcing Yang back into action. But that action will come at a great cost, when Yang's old clan comes to collect at the same time.

    Does this film deliver on what it promises? For the most part, no. Sure, there are some decent bits, Geoffrey Rush in particular. The Oscar winner is SORELY out of place in this film, because the actors in this film vary from just okay to ass hurting-ly bad- to wide eyed "this got through the DAILIES?!" bad. The biggest waste of an actor I've seen this year goes to Ti Lung, veritable Martial Arts movie legend, as leader of the Sad Flutes (the clan of assassins that Yang belongs to). Delivering some of the choicest bits in the movie, he's only shown in the hunt, or acting as the vaguely wise and sinister mentor. Otherwise, he's looking off in the scenery, most likely thinking "Well, at least it's not a Michael Bay film..."

     Special note must be taken for first time director Sngmoo Lee. Not only was Lee the director of this film, but he was ALSO the writer (of which it was also first script). Which begs the question: Who the hell did he know, how much did he pay them, and in lieu of that, how many of his kids did he sacrifice to dark gods in order to get a straight attempt at cinema glory? It's incredibly indescribable the sheer odds that, with no experience in making films, he was able to get the green light to not only get one of his screenplays made into a movie, but that the studio went "SURE! Go ahead and make your film! Here's a lot of money and many of our production crew! Have at you!" They had to be major idiots or amazingly ballsy to think that they can get anybody and make their films blockbusters...

    Oh wait. This film was made by Rogue Pictures. Never mind. It was to be automatically expected.

    The effects in this film go from "decent murky sepia tone" to "holy crap, this wasn't even good in 1998" with the swing of a sword. In all honesty, if this film came out in 1996 or 1997, it would be considered good for it's time. But this is the era of Blu-ray and High Definition detail. If you somehow saw this in 3D, this film would be COMPLETELY difficult to watch. There were too many moments where the film decides that instead of PS3 caliber graphics, it goes Sega CD on our asses with the intent of saying it's an HD film. I'm not saying that's bad (but only if I'm talking about something from 1995). But it's over a decade and a half since that disastrous console, and the film decides that it's good enough for the general audience? Uh uh. Not gonna happen. You'd have a better chance with an "updated" game than with these pixelated chunks of blood and vomit.
     Some of the more CG moments didn't even make sense. Many have brought up the little wispy quote that interrupts the first scene of the movie. I'm going to go a few steps further. Many of the battle scenes are bloodless when shot. Hell, there are moments when characters get hit, and not even a drop of blood is spilled. The blood is almost ALWAYS CG, and when it comes to physical effects, there are far too few. For a Martial Arts movie, that's a BIG no no. The point of a battle scene in a movie is to show that the toll of battle is more of a cost than the lives snuffed out by the hero/villain. What does this film do? It decides to make the heroes and villains practically immortal until they are stabbed.

     In Hong Kong Cinema, Wuxia (the martial arts fantasy subcategory) suffered a serious decline because of it's attempt to make their heroes effectively UNBEATABLE. This decline kicked into high gear with the "brawler" movies that were epitomized by Bruce Lee. It wasn't until the early 80's, when kids who grew up on those films sought to make them more appealing. The greatest of whom was Tsui Hark, whose films included Zu: Warriors from the Magic Mountain, A Chinese Ghost Story, the Butterfly Murders, and Once Upon a Time in China.
     Even here in the States, Wuxia held a place of love and respect. One of the most loved and quoted movies that we all uphold was, at heart, a Wuxia Western. That's right. This movie had a cowboy (well, the modern equivalent in some people's eyes), fantasy, guys flying around swinging swords, mystical techniques or abilities, and even two girls with green eyes. That's right, the Spoony one's favorite movie, Big Trouble in Little China, was the product of John Carpenter seeing and falling in love with Tsui Hark's original Zu: Warriors from the Magic Mountain.
    What does that have to do with this film? If you've seen both movies, and put them side by side, the comparison is obvious.

    I will give the film some credit, though. The soundtrack is high quality, a solid recommendation from a fan of solid soundtracks. Whereas it's not as fun as, say, Kung Fu Hustle's soundtrack, or memorable as Morricone's Man with No Name trilogy, it's still a must have for fans of stand alone scene markers. Even though the action scenes are obviously from the Zack Snyder school of Direction (which I HATE with a passion) there were some interesting or effective scenes that drew my attention. The scene with the passionate kiss between Kate Bosworth and Dong-gun Jang was well shot, and had all the appropriate touches to make it worthy of being in the trailer. And the Hallway scene, where they use gunfire to create a strobe effect, was without a doubt genius, especially from the way the rest of the last battle was shot, up to then.

    To be completely fair, my expectations for this film, going in, were way too high. But before the film was begun, I gave myself time to bring it down to a point were I could be objective about the film. And that might have been the only thing to save it in my eyes. If you want to see a western with basically the same premise, watch Django. Not Sukiyaki Western Django, the original. If you want a Martial Arts film about a swordsman with a kid, watch Shogun Assassin, aka Lone Wolf and Cub. You want a good (well, relatively speaking, of course) movie with kung fu and cowboys? Watch the Stranger and the Gunfighter, starring Lo Lieh and Lee Van Cleef. Those films, if they are what you're aiming for, deserve to be in your library way before this film. As it stands, it's better as background noise on cable than it is as a personal copy. Which is a damn shame. Cowboys and Ninjas shouldn't be this dull.

    At least we got see Kate Bosworth in a corset, trying her damnedest to be Kate Beckinsale. Even though they told us what a "sad flute" was, and never F***ING DELIVERED...